two possible lessons to learn from this

So, by the name of our family blog here, you may have gathered that we are not famous for fabulous hair. As a rule, we as a family have squirrely, crazy, uncooperative hair. We have found some products that help tame the "Cave-iness" out of it, but this morning I didn't use any.

You all have seen pictures of Lily with her cave-hair. Even freshly combed, one 3 minute ride in the carseat later, and it looks like pidgeons have roosted in it. (we test this theory every Sunday morning, and in fact, it takes only 3 minutes to go from adorable to horrible...the exact same amount of time it takes to get from our driveway to the chapel doors.)

This morning, Lily got a finger-comb through her hair, a pair of jeans (clean, not handmedowns) and sweatshirt (clean, and not a handmedown), and a perfectly horrible pair of "princess" ugg type boots we paid 3 dollars for at walmart that she has worn into a horrible, stained, Ugg-ly mess. For the record, I hate them and find them innappropriate for public viewing, but they are her favorite...thus the condition...and its Saturday and if she wants to put on her princess boots, who cares?

We went to McDonalds to play with cousins at the play-place, we walked into the children's area, frankly looking quite a bit cleaner than some of the other patrons, but still in Saturday morning, "A finger comb is good enough" mode.

Lily walked past an old man who was having breakfast with his wife (at McDonalds, in the Children's play area on a Saturday---lets keep this in mind) and I see him look at Lily, shake his head, look at his wife and say "i'd be surprised if she even has underpants on." I looked at him, shocked, and said "She's mine, she does have panties on, and they are even clean, thank you very much." Then I turned around, totally and completely mortified to be on the recieving end of that kind of criticism.

So here are my two options for lessons learned:
A: Never EVER leave the house without perfectly coifed children. Clean clothes are not enough, hair must be done. If I know 3 minutes can destroy the "do", keep a comb, curl-enhancer, and spray-mister with water in my purse at all times. (which I have actually considered doing from time to time.) Don't enter public places unless cave-hair has been tamed.

or

B: Be a little less judgemental of others when I see dirty kids running around after school or on a Saturday. Maybe, it really is just Saturday afterall and the condition of the kids at mcDonald's on a Saturday morning bears no reflection on their homelife.

In the end, when the man left, Jp very politely approached him and said "I think you owe my wife an apology"...and the man very kindly offered one, agreeing that he had spoken out of place and had forgotten where he was when he made his remark. I accepted the apology, but I still feel really embarrassed. Partly because I knew I hadn't put much effort into looking appropriate for going out in public, and partly because I know I am guilty of being critical of other mother's in public.

What if I've said something that hurt another mother the way I felt hurt today?

It's a terrible feeling.